This is an open blog entry. This means that if one has an idea to add, or a revision to a certain theory, or to just comment how crappy this will end up, I will take it into consideration and change if need be. No boundaries; anyone of any gender can suggest. Think of it like the Bible. It's a bunch of ideas, and it'll be organized eventually so that categories and theories will be set accordingly (I know some pious group is gonna beat me up for that...). S,o here we go...
ANT'S THEORY OF RIGHTS TO RELATIONSHIPS (work-in-progress)
(#)- open for discussion
GOOD
1) If he/she can deal with you hanging out with an opposite sex, and he/she doesn't make it seem awkward or knows nothing is going on with you and that opposite sex... then BY GOD, stick with that person! Those kinda women/men are rare as hell!
2) Patience. If the couple can both have patience with each other.
3) (Applies to #1) If he/she doesn't get sensitive about the smallest detail, like you talking or just walking with an opposite sex.
BAD
1) (#) Holding hands= bushwa. If the most you can do is hold hands, what's the point to begin with?2) There are mainly two types of 'relationships' men look into:
- An actual "I love you" where he ACTUALLY loves you
- A relationship where it honestly feels like it won't last long
That's a really good point about the types of relationships. I mean, I've been in relationships before when I knew it wasn't going anywhere and wasn't all that surprised when it ended. One thing you have to keep in mind though Ant, we're in high school. It's a proven fact that dating is a crucial part of our social development as teenagers and that staying with just one person throughout your high school life can usually be harmful in the long run. I mean, if you're one of the lucky ones to find that special person in high school and get married to them and you live happily ever after, obviously there's no harm done to your dating life. But if you stay with the same person all throughout high school and then break up once you leave, you're gonna have to start from scratch with relationships, cause pretty much everything you know about them applied to that person. So actually, if you're in a relationship that you don't feel is really going to last long, it's not exactly bad if it's not harmful to either of you. Enjoy it while it lasts and then no hard feelings when it's over. In my opinion, I think that when you're in that sort of relationship, you should try to make it clear to the other that you don't feel like they're "the one" (I hate that term) but still want to be with them for the time being. If they can understand that, great. If they can't, well too bad, their loss.
ReplyDeleteAnother thing I'd like to add to your rights is that the breakup needs to be talked about. Half the stress that comes out of a breakup is not knowing why it happened, and I've got real proof that just by discussing with the person and coming to an honest, open conclusion about why you're breaking up makes all the difference. One of my exes is still one of my closest friends for that very reason.
As a final note, I'd just like to point out that the organization of this post really needs work and I had to read over it a couple times to really understand what you were trying to say. I know you haven't organized it yet, but I'd just like to point it out that you should do that. :)
I'd like to think of the ideal relationship as a hyper-platonic one, along the lines of "friends with benefits", in the conventional sense, but with the backbone of commitment.
ReplyDelete