My 18th birthday

18 years. Yet it feels like a lifetime.

I could say it started on the first part of the week, instead of my actual birthday on Friday. I was selected for the inFAMOUS 2 beta, or how much I'm enjoying working on this play as crew, or how this would probably be a long week of anticipation for my birthday. Either way, the rest of this week was something to write about.

For starters, to my surprise, I recieved a code to the inFAMOUS 2 beta. The beta keys were sent about a week ago, I thought it would be the end, but it's as if... the last ticket, for me... I was left jumping. Oh, the joy, oh, the rush! Yeah, sure, that same night Mary Scheirer was tempting everyone with her letter from SCAD, people were talking about advances in their lives, being accepted to colleges... for a moment, I lost care. All that mattered was that I was selected by a generous game company to test the exclusive online beta for the fantastic and upcoming inFAMOUS 2. But that was for a moment...

Left and right, my friends from schools abroad were being accepted to colleges? And I'm just sitting where I am. For the past few weeks, I have been going over my college info, and so much was missing before an acceptance could be made. I've been almost pestering ASU admission about my missing documents, because those documents were sent. I did send my information, my SAT scores, my Verification of Lawful Presence, my Immunization Form, I did everything! How was I not being accepted?!? This is Augusta State University. This shouldn't have to be so difficult! I felt sorry for pestering, but there had to be some problem. This week, after another email telling me they looked but still couldn't find any of those forms, I confronted my dad again, and he actually insisted on searching his make-shift office to show me he sent it.

He never did. Over a month and a half, and I was about ready to explode at ASU, when my dad realized he never sent that envelope. I should've expected this, but when I asked him again this week whether he actually sent all the information... he searches around, an interruption, and shows me the envelope, with the ASU address printed on the familiar household envelope as I look over my college stats on this laptop... and tells me it was buried under bills. This rush, I was ready to break his neck, in so many ways... in fact, the thought still lurches in me as I type this... again, I should have expected this from him, I trusted him with this... what in God's name... I exploded at him like I've never exploded at anyone before in my life. I wanted to mutilate him. For putting me through this, for putting my future at risk, under a desk of his life: bills. A life that irritates the living hell out of me. Even if it was for a month or so, I lost my patience, energy, with this meaningless problem. That moment broke it.


The next day, as I could check my merged email via Microsoft Outlook on our school computers, I emailed both admission recruiters, who've stuck with me since my application process, a subtle apology and explanation. My dad would personally send-in the forms to the college that day. That same night, I received a reply from one of the admission recruiters, the one who usually comes to our school and sets a "college recruitment  booth", understood, and introduced me by his casual name, Ryan, and insisted we should hang out as he implied my acceptance to ASU. The next morning, a Thursday, I look at my myASU, and indeed, I've been accepted to Augusta State University. Again, ASU isn't a college for me to jump over... at least, maybe not yet; don't even want to jump about college... but it's a start, somewhere. My parents bring in good news for the day, don't remember what, though, but I toss in my good news, and... yeah. ASU.

What also began this week, or maybe weeks before, was working with crew for our class presentation of A Midsummer Night's Dream. Again, I don't know a damn about the play, I have no interest in it, I had no interest, period... until I took note that Sonia McCall was in as set designer. A slight interest, yes, but then realizing how nobody was taking pictures of this play? Oh, no, somebody has to... so I enlisted. For the most part, I was the clumsy one who didn't know what and where, so I basically sat around and waited for the girls to give me orders. Take it like a man... but take it from Sonia? I think I'd oblige. The main cake was work on this huge canvas that would be the backdrop for the play. She painted a print representation of the canvas, and gridded it onto this canvas. She is an artist, but she is a handy man. I don't know whether this is good or awkward, didn't matter, got to get this thing done.

Only eventually, did I really get active and social with them all. Within a few days, would I notice an infinite amount of comfort working with these women, than I ever did with our othersome women in our drama department, in two years. There's always something to talk about, something that would be entertaining, never a dull moment, it is fun. I feel good working here. Crew, I don't know yet, it's tedious, but at least here. Sonia herself is, straight-up, an absolute goddess to look at, anyway, but she has such personality and ego, with her art but with herself... alright, I am getting ahead of myself, as usual, but... I am happy here. I never feel awkward, or forced, there isn't tension. I love it. Everyday is a day to look forward to working with her and her team. I like her. She's gorgeous, she's got character, she's fun... and I'm only just getting to know her. I'm gonna feel bad when this is over, because it'll be a day spent not working with her, and chatting about God knows what with her, and back to just glances and hellos' in the hall... but I'm only just getting to know her.

Anyway, something else that would've made my 18th more significant was a wanting to restart. With Playstation. I may have posted about this earlier, or not (I don't want rediscuss this, it's too much for one thing) but basically, PSN's terrible network system did come to haunt my non-existent Master Account, and my Sub-Account was now useless... anyway, I wanted to start anew. See, I'll officially be 18, I can give actual legit account information like I wanted to years ago (which gave way to my Sub-Account and eventual dilemma), had a new email, plans for a new username (notice Blogger header), I was getting tired of using other's accounts, I wanted back in. Upload my reclaimed and new Trophies, my PSN friends, Uncharted 2 multiplayer, finally jump the gun on COD Black Ops multiplayer, my inFAMOUS 2 beta (thank you, thank you, THANK YOU, Sucker Punch), Netflix... I wanted back in! Studied for Economics, listened to the Rolling Stones...12:04am! Turn on my system, rush to the User, click the icon, click 'Create A New Account', load!... 'An error has occured.'

This eventual PSN shutdown would last for the next five days.


Next morning, the birth day, wake up, good morning, "Anthony! Happy birthday! Get down, breakfast! See you." Bye, guys. Kitchen, Hot Pocket. Make it to school, sit down, study over my Economics again, Sean and Tyler appear, put my book up, talk, whip out my Spider-Man LEGO figure (for my RoboLab for Mrs. McKean's Java class, of course), and we high school students find entertainment out of a LEGO figure. Oh, I'm 18, alright.

For some reason, the only thing I can talk about during the birthday week is my birthday; when the actual birthday comes along, I hardly mention it. It's my 18th birthday, first thing I do is sit down and study from my Economics book. The day goes on, nothing to write home about, but wishful thinking from friends to wish me a good birthday. That's enough for me. Good friends, honest friends, a good time, that's enough for me. It was after our A-lunch Friday where my day began...

The first practice performance of our play, for a small critiquing audience. Again, I'm in crew, so my priority was to work on our canvas and whatever else my boss would request. Sam. He opens the door, indicates me to follow him, and tells me my new boss, our play set coordinator (we have a set-coordinator, now?), to follow set protocall while the play is in motion. Okay, this is new, but whatever, after 12:55am, I have to quit and go to my classes.


4 hours.

Rebecca gives me absolutely no orders. I'm backstage for the rest of the school day, and missed the rest of my classes, with the impression that I'm more than likely skipping class and possibly threaten my exam excemptions. No position to get Mrs. Simons over to tell her what just happened, since a play was in-performance. The play finally ends, it's 2:45pm, alright, I should at least get Mrs. Simons to email my teachers, and catch my bus alright. The play finally ends, it's 2:45pm, the directors of our play lock their doors and exclude access like SS generals, everyone is ordered to sit down and wait, I missed my bus, my dad's phone is off, what the fuck just happened...

After another hour of useless, non-stop lecturing about our play and performing, we're free to leave. The play is surprisingly still a go. Mrs. Simons, can you email my teachers, tell them I had to stick around for the rest of the performance? Why, what are you doing here, etc, etc? Well, how 'bout Sam unexpectedly pulling me over and somehow making me a part of this crew of the play? Were you given a prior-approval? You never gave me one; this just happened today. Anthony, I can't do that, etc, etc, teachers will think you're skipping, etc, either you're in trouble for skipping classes, or I'm in trouble for letting a student stay without any prior approval, etc. Sam isn't your teacher, who's your teacher? Mrs. Simons, Sam is your responsibility, you can't just pin this on me, I was just following orders...

My blood heats. My face boils. I exit the school silent, in a rage. I leave a message on my dad's phone, telling him that I wasted hours after school for the play after all, the buses are gone, and I'm just walking home. Happy birthday.

The long walk home, but at least I actually had lunch and a lighter load. This cut it. All that's ever happened with me and this damn drama department was my full devotion to the two years I've spent in this department, and no credit for anything. Mrs. Simons has given me bullshit, this was where the straw was finally broken. I'm staying for Sonia now. After this play, failure or not, I am done. The last three weeks I'll spend in this school, I won't have any involvement with any of the shit I'm gonna have to do. I've been told before how she milks students to do her work, I never noticed or cared, now I do. I am glad this is my last year here, maybe just for this reason. I now understand why I've lost my touch with theatre. I thought it was me, I felt blank and loose about theatre, I loved it but didn't know why I wasn't so into it as before, but it wasn't me, all along. This class, this school subject, a dream, a love, and this teacher dwindles it down with no care in the world. I am, I'm done.

Thank God for Allen Harris, though, to cheer me up for the rest of the walk, as him and his fellow comrades play ultimate frisbee in the field I pass by walking. I'm in my neighborhood. I check my mail... the official letter from ASU indicating my acceptance. A smile. I'm home now. David said in an email today at school that he sent a package, and should arrive today. Anticipation, is there a package infront of the door? I bet there is. There is. My anguish, my wonderful day is interrupted by this usher of ignorance hours ago, but I'm home. My cat, greeting me? Does he know it's my birthday? A wonderful cat rubbing his head on my leg, an acceptance letter from Augusta State, Killzone 3 still wrapped and waiting, and now A Cartoon History of the Modern World collection from David, which I've taken a literary interest in before. I'm sweaty and exhausted to play my new video game, so I decide to unwind and hunker down for a little while downstairs. I continue on towards Platinum on God of War III, but the parents arrive home in a few hours (conveniently when I reach Poseidon's Chamber, with his nude princess taking center-stage, of course. Haha). The usual ice-cream cake with the same cherry red Happy Birthday Anthony! ontop, and dinner... from Captain D's? Um, alrighty, then. We put on our rented copy of The King's Speech, and eat our dinner as we view.

Life can be good like this.


Killzone 3 itself seems like what the reviews have been saying so far. The story and dialogue seems weak and predictable (though that may be because I spoiled most of it via those reviews), but the action and pacing is fun and ecentric. I was really looking foward to a new PSN account, but this shutdown came at a more inconvenient time.

Saturday was also part of the birthday plan, really since my parents were busy on my birthday Firday. The plan? Dinner at Hooters, with the camera, and movies at GTC Masters, the dollar theater, for The Adjustment Bureau. Until then, work was made on our stove and fridge, for some odd reason, and TV informmercials aren't all full of crap, at least, not from something like Kaboom! cleaner. Billy Mays never lies. It did wonders for my bathtub months ago, it did wonders for the atrocious mess behind the stove. Back and forth, back and forth, make up your mind, do you want a sponge or a rag? Bucket of water? Screwdriver or what? After the work, I watched and learned as my dad fixed one of the car's headlights, and taught me about cars. Jon's season finale of 'Arby 'n' the Chief ' was uploaded, and it's definitely his finest work. The thing about longevity and improvement. He's got it.

Eventually, we reach the time for dinner... and for some unexplainable reason, I questioned my decision about Hooters for dinner? Was it because of an interest in more diverse food? Or Sonia? Or the drinkers and horny rednecks that make the atmosphere of Hooters? Or how somewhat awkward my first trip last year was? Last moment, it's Hooters; it's closest to the movies, anyway, and we had but a mere hour before our film began. Unlike last year, business was quiet. Hardly any wild people or even Hooter Girls. Our waitress wasn't the eccentric Amanda from last year. My dad tossed out that it was my birthday today (though it was yesterday), and our waitress simply gave a mere "Oh, happy birthday." I can respect that, but... this is Hooters! I thought there would be a Hooters Hokey-Pokey like last year! And we finally had our camera! I left very :(

The Adjustment Bureau was a passable movie... and it sure beat Inception to me. I honestly didn't like much about that movie, really. Maybe the special effects, I dunno... the movie ends, and I leave the theater, I hold the door for a few folks leaving the theater, then headed out, and suddenly (a different) Sean appears, and I can be sure Ashyr, Ashyre, would be right behind. I glance at her, she catches, says "Hey" very subtly, I replay "Hi." very subtly, they enter the theater, I continue heading out. For a brief moment, as I stood and waited outside in the humid night air, I suddenly soaked something in.


Ashyr, the coolest person I got to know Sophomore year, someone I cared so very much about, and was more than glad was my good friend, and in two, three years...

Nothing. No emotion. It was just lost. I haven't seen her, talked to her for years... and my vivid imagination, of seeing a very old, lost friend appear in the same movie theater as I, and Ashyr becomes one of those friends... nothing. Two, three years... how far... I didn't hesitate to stop and hug, or catch up for abit, I didn't feel a thing. Nothing. Now granted, Sean was obviously near, so any thought of anything of the sort would mean nothing with her pussy of a boyfriend around... but I still felt like there was ever anything. And even now, I still don't feel anything, despite writing about this right now. Just nothing.

It's almost like a message from the movie. Planned or unplanned, life can do these things. I'm constantly questioning about "spending each day like it was my last". I almost never have that feeling of fulfilliment... yet, I realized this week that I see everyday. There is never a dull moment with my every day.

18 years, one week, and it already feels like I've experienced enough for one lifetime.


- Ant